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| I have always said, or thought, that it is funny how life winds it's way through a series of events. Today, I got to do the coolest thing ever!! I had the opportunity to conduct the Oklahoma Youth Wind Symphony. OYWS is a part of the Oklahoma Youth Symphonies organization, and I've been working with them for quite a while. Earlier this year, I counted the years I've been associated with the organization and came up with 12. My first four years were as a high school student the following 8 have been employed as the music librarian.
Let's face it, while I was in college, I more or less took the Librarian job because I needed the income. I have always believed in the organization, and I always will, but the REAL original reason?? It was money. I have always enjoyed working with the kids, and being exposed to new people and music. With that organization, I have had the great opportunity to meet and get to know some wonderful people that I will always hold close to my heart. I have had the opportunity to learn from them and to dream that one day, like them, I would get the opportunity to stand in front of that group and actually conduct on a concert.
Today, my dream, that dream, came true. I conducted three pieces on the concert today. It was such a great feeling to be on the podium in front of a group of kids that was attentive, always ready and willing to learn. It was so awesome to be able to stand there and make music with them, and to know that we were having a good time! They played so well, and I was and am so proud of them. In an ideal world, this opportunity would present itself again, however, I don't think that will happen. I don't have enough years or degrees for that to happen.
In the wake of such a great day, there was a bit of a dark spot. There are certain things that happen in life that we want to share with our friends and family. Today was one of those days. The one person that I absolutely did NOT expect to see today was there, and I was so happy to see him. I felt in that moment that I saw him walk through the door relieved that there was at least one person who was there to see me and share in my dream. He sacrificed a lot to be there, and my mom couldn't be bothered to drive 20 miles. THAT hurts! A day that should've been filled with joy and happiness is now filled with emptiness and solitude.
I understand that people are busy, and some things couldn't be helped, but understanding doesn't mean that I like it, and it doesn't help with the disappointment. And it's not even so much the disappointment in them. It's disappointment in me. Maybe if I were a better friend or daughter they would've come...they would've seen how important it was to me for them to be there, but they didn't.
I really just wanted to share this great life moment, this once in a lifetime opportunity with all of the people I love and care about. That didn't happen, and it will be difficult to talk about the concert to them without re-experiencing the loneliness I feel now. However, there is one person I can talk to about this experience and it will bring me joy, and it means so much to me that he was there to cheer me on and support me...I can't even express what that means. I am very grateful for his friendship, love and support. I will never be able to express in words what happiness his being there brought me today.
I had better go, it's getting close to bedtime.
I know I don't update much, but I hope that those of you that read this are doing well.
Until next time.....
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| Well, New Year's Day for me is always a day of reflection of the past year. I don't usually make New Year's resolutions, but I do enjoy looking back on the past year so, here's a quick recap of 2007.
From OMEA in January to Midwest in December, a lot has changed in my professional life over the past year. While I was at OMEA in January, besides getting to hang out with a composer friend of mine, I learned a lot and met a lot of great new people. I went from being an adjunct band director, to a full time band director. I am enjoying my time at Mayfield, and it's difficult to believe that the year is half over. Where did it go??!! I'm still teaching with the George N. Parks Drum Major Academy, and loving it. I have had the opportunity to meet so many great people...staff and students alike, and I always continue to learn. The High School band is getting better, and that's all we can ask for really. I look forward to the time when they are a force to be reckoned with, and when they understand that what they do is more than just music, it's a life lesson. My Middle school band is doing well. We still have a long way to go, but I feel that we are moving in the right direction.
Midwest this year was a great experience. I know I haven't written much about it, but that's because there were so many good things that happened. I learned a lot, and got to see some great performing ensembles. Also, I had the opportunity to hang out with some old friends that I hadn't seen since college. That was AWESOME!!!
I'm a firm believer that a lot of the time, we don't realize how much people have impacted our lives until they aren't there and then you run into them and get to have good, quality conversation. We talked about old times, and current times and the future, and it was just a great time. And of course, I met some new people that I will definitely try to stay in contact with.
Now, I at times have difficulty separating personal and professional. So, I'm going to kind of lump it all together. I have forged some great new friendships at my new job, and met many wonderful people who all have the best interest of the students at heart. I have really enjoyed getting to know some of these people, and hope that these are friendships that will last a lifetime.
I have found in the past year that with new relationships and a new "role" in life I feel at times that I have lost touch with some people that are very dear to me, so in 2008, I'm going to try to do better with that.
I don't know what 2008 holds for me, but I hope for all of you, and of your hopes and dreams come true. May 2008 be the best year for all of us. Happy New Year, Friends!
Best,
CW | | |
| While in Chicago at Midwest I was talking with friend who is a composer. We were talking about text in band works, and his Symphony for Band which was premiered in November of 2006 he uses a soprano in the third movement. Well, the soprano part is a vocalise...no text, only oohs and ahhs. He was telling me that after the premier some guy walked up to him and said, "Hey, I loved the text in the third movement. It was great!" The guy was totally serious. Some people....
What made me think of it, is I just listened to the third movement...very clearly oohs and ahhs.....
If you ever get the chance to hear or program it....it's a great piece.
CW | | |
| So, I haven't updated in a while. My trip to Chicago, among the quirks and stupid people ended up being really good. I was able to spend a lot of time with people that I don't normally see, and I was glad for that. I also got to meet some great new people, who I hope to stay in touch with!
I ran across some lyrics the other day that speaks highly of my current state of mind.
Falling by Keri Noble
Standing here outside your door
Not sure if you're home
Wondering if I'm a fool
Maybe I should go
Usually I'm fearless
But I've become undone
A clown without even a disguise
Now everyone will know that I've
Fallen
Fallen
I've fallen in love
And I can't make sense of it
Don't know how this happened
I can't say for sure
But suddenly I'm incomplete
Sustaining on the hope
If you should see me face to face
If you could hear my heart
You might feel this terrifying something rising up and you've
Fallen
Fallen
You've fallen in love
And you can't make sense of it
So there you go. | | |
| So, I have decided that people suck...so here are the rules...
If you are going to say only negative things...keep your mouth shut!
As an educator, don't destroy those who are just getting into the business. When you do that you break their spirit and cause them to over-analyze their potential lifes work.
When I shut down because someone said something to me like, "West is the only high school you'll ever work out in the state of Oklahoma because you aren't good enough to go somewhere else. And the people that hired you in the first place are stupid because you shouldn't be teaching." DON'T TRY TO MAKE ME TALK ABOUT IT!!! I'll talk about it when I'm ready. However, if you feel that it's been too long since the event that you feel you need to hunt me down...don't be surprised when I blow up on you. If you know me well enough to hunt me down, then you will know that I'm not blowing up on you because it's you. I'm blowing up on you because I need to blow up on someone, and that's why I didn't want to talk to you about it in the first place.
Those are the rules...please follow them. :smile: | | |
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